Christian Marriage

Congratulations!

The Ministers and Elders offer their congratulations on your forthcoming wedding, and are pleased that you seek a Christian marriage within our Church.

This first of all involves celebration. It is an occasion on which you, your friends and relations will be joyful. The Church will rejoice with you. Every wedding is seen as an occasion to give thanks to God for the gift of love.

The church will seek to support you. It will do so by its prayers for your happiness and growth together. We will try to keep in touch with you, and to this end one of our Ministers will visit you after you are married, in order to extend the Church's pastoral care to you. If you are moving away after your wedding, the Ministers will commend you to a church near your new home. We shall always be ready to listen to your anxieties and problems, and to share in your happiness. In short, we shall help you to realise the Christian ideal of life-long marriage.

"Who can get married in your church?"

If you come to see a Minister about getting married in our Church, you should be aware of certain points. He will ask you to speak openly about your faith and what it means to you. He will not expect you to believe everything, nor require that your commitment be very large. It is important that you have some belief, for otherwise there is not much honesty in asking for God's blessing on your marriage.

"What if I've been divorced?"

In cases where one or both of you has been divorced, the Minister will expect you to be thoroughly open and honest about the cause of the marriage breakdown. He will also explain the forgiveness and new chances that are offered to us by Jesus Christ. The fact that you have been divorced and are now seeking re-marriage does not necessarily mean that you cannot be married in our Church.

"Can we say what we like in the wedding?"

By law, there are certain words that must be said. For the rest of the ceremony, there is a great flexibility about what can be said, and what music can be included. Remember, though, that the wedding ceremony is first and foremost Christian worship. The Minister who will conduct your wedding will be happy to talk with you about the choice of music and any variations to the standard wedding service that you would like to make this a very special day for you.

"What happens now?"

Normally, there will be at least three meetings:

1. A preliminary interview after which you will normally know whether you can be married in our church, and dates and times can be fixed up. At this meeting, the legal requirements will be explained to you, and you will be told the costs of getting married here.
2. At least one discussion together about the Church's teaching on marriage, possibly together with other couples. Depending on your individual circumstances, we may agree together to hold more than of these meetings. Some couples benefit from a more structured approach to this, and you may be asked to think about certain topics at home and discuss them together before we meet again. This is a crucial part to the preparation for marriage. Whatever your experience, you will reap the rewards from the time invested at this stage.
3. During the week before the wedding, a run-through of the ceremony so that on the day the service progresses smoothly and holds meaning for you both. This will involve the other people who will perform important roles on your wedding day - your parents, the best man, bridesmaids, and so on.

Each of these meetings will be informal, so you need not be worried that you will say the wrong thing!

"Who can give me more information?"

If you wish to be married in our church or would like to talk more about the possibility, please contact one of the Ministers as soon as possible and make an appointment to meet. If you feel that you cannot meet the requirements outlined on this page, we thank you for contacting us, and wish you every blessing for the future.